Life Lesson 2

Just to reiterate, I know these Life Lessons may in fact be controversial to say the least. Use them or don’t use them. Remember to keep in mind that we cannot live on someone else’s conviction. We need to grab hold of our own personal convictions and only then can we live with meaning. I do hope these lessons will challenge current perspectives.

(Read more on Life Lesson 1)

#2: Being a hero comes at a cost

Whether you asked for it or not, circumstances can sometimes subtly dictate and autonomously place one specific person in the spotlight without any conscious choice. Most often this is not something one could ever prepare for or even just have a moment to consider, and no opportunity is given to accept or decide upon. It just happens.

One is thrust into a position of leadership, where an exceedingly heavy mantle of responsibility is unconsciously taken upon one’s shoulders and carried through the circumstantial period of time. It happens at the blink of an eye. The natural fight or flight reaction of our brain chooses to fight. Not flight! It chooses to survive, chooses to save a life and chooses to ensure right prevails despite the repercussions. And all this without any reasoning or logic.

And only some time later, reality hits home. The implications and consequences of what was done, the good and maybe the not so good if any, begins to play devil’s advocate. And before you know it, the age old question reveals itself and cries out ‘Why me?’.

Enter the pool of self-pity that begins to heavily weigh down on you with each ‘Why me?’.

Yes, being a hero comes with much honour and sometimes even prestige, mostly unwanted. With all the best of intentions, it can even have the appearance of a profession one would want to grow up into. But being a hero eventually plays out and takes it’s toll on you emotionally, mentally and physically without any persuasion or comfort. It just happens without your permission. And no one was designed to carry that kind of responsibility. It can wreak absolute havoc with thought processes and emotional stability if not identified and accepted sooner rather than later.

For me, I reached a point where I was on the verge of losing everything. It’s a hard place to be and one to be avoided at all costs. Quite ironic that sometimes this very point is just what is needed to shock the brain back into realizing just exactly what you do have and how much value that already has – just enough at just the right time.

I honestly do not know how to wrap this one up, but maybe I can leave you with just these suggestions:

  1. Humbly acknowledge being a hero
  2. Recognize and deal with the effects (no matter how small or big) even if it means seeking professional help
  3. Be grateful, even though life may be overwhelming