For me, one of lifes most difficult tasks is making right decisions, good decisions, especially when seemingly under pressure. We all know there are many guidelines and decision-making steps out there. Some give helpful information and others provide good logical approaches on how one should go about this. I however, sometimes like to swim against the flow and experience life from a different current. And so I have managed to build my own algorithm so to say.
This is how it goes:
Once you have the full picture of the problem or the opportunity, it is here where I try to take a moment to just be still. To really listen. Here I am referring to listening to your heart. You know that deep gut feel. That quiet voice within. Not clouded by emotions or drowned out by voices and the urgency of those pushing you into a corner for an answer, right now! Just be quiet and still, for however long you need.
It really is simple. If you dont have the chance to listen, don’t make the decision. Just from this one simple act I already start to feel more at ease. And out of this will come one, two or possibly many options or choices on what to decide. Once I’m at this point, I progress onwards.
List the options or choices, write them down if it makes it easier, or talk them through. For me, speaking out loud in my car helps me formulate and paint the picture to gain a better perspective and understanding. If you need an actual person to bounce this off, then talk it through with someone who can provide an objective point of view with the aim of listing. Remember at this point, it is not to provide the answer, but just to make a list.
Once the options or choices are clearly listed, it’s time to test them. And there’s no better way than to test them against the real heart stuff.
3. Value alignment
The question I ask here is simply this: ‘Does the option or choice align with my values?’
- Is it honest?
- Is it authentic?
- Is it from a place of love?
- Is it beneficial? (Not detrimental)
- Is it important? (Not urgent)
If any one of these are in conflict, that option or choice is at this point instantly discarded and I start to work through the next one. When the test is passed, the final part of the algorithm can be tested.
At this point, the option or choice is probably a good 90 percent there. Don’t be fooled though. It’s so easy to think that the one option or choice that has passed your value test, is indeed the one that must be the solution. Maybe it is, but sometimes it’s not.
The problem if we end the process now, is that if it doesn’t stand this last final test so to say, the decision may appear to be everything you wanted and needed, but often it ends abruptly with no warning, leaving you disappointed and regretful. We all do it so often, losing patience all too quickly. We just need to push through this last tough test of the algorithm. It must be given the chance to prove true or not.
Here I simply look at the present versus the future:
- Will this option or choice have good, abundant, eternal consequences?
- Will it stir faith in what I believe?
If it’s YES, then that’s what you need to go with. If it’s NO, maybe you need to reassess. And when you finally make the decision, it may turn out to be the most scariest or most out of character thing for you to do. However, be assured it will have long-lasting good consequences. It will be right.
So there it is. My algorithm on how to be decidingly decisive is based on love:
- Value alignment
#Just try it!